Sunday, May 17, 2009

Babylon 5 can be rather cruel in its stories.

So I just went surfing on wikipedia a bit and found out that Lennier was in love in Delenn. Ya know, I always thought there was something going on in there with those two. But of course, this love is unrequited, since Delenn goes and marries Sheridan.

Ya know, that must've been really hard for Lennier, having to hide his feelings all those years while serving Delenn. I mean, super super hard and frustrating and hard and difficult and frustrating. Sexually frustrating too. It's just sad how that turned out, right? Here's this girl you've known and been close to all these years, but does she feel the same way as you do? No, she's just running off into the arms of this station captain/commander guy. Is Sheridan a captain or a commander? I dunno. Sisko was commander of DS9 before getting to captain, so I guess stations can be commanded by a commander instead of a captain. But Sheridan sounds kinda like he'd be a captain, doesn't he? Nevermind, the point is... Lennier got the short end of the stick, so to speak. Just stuck at "friend." How's he supposed to live like that? It must've been torture, pur tortue. Like, a hole burning through the back of his mind everytime he had to look at her, right? Cause she's just there, nonchalant, probably thinking about Sheridan, while he's wondering why he can't win her eye.

Cause seriously, if you've known someone for eight or more years and you still love them throughout that time, it's not gonna change or go away. He's not somehow going to "get over it." So he just keeps holding his hidden torch for her. Lennier, he just isn't able to see himself with any other woman. It's because he's put Delenn up on this Minbari pedestal and ya know, it's just possible for any other woman to measure up. It's this really deep and intense love and sometimes he just wants to curl up and die because, well... why not? Why not just curl up and die when Delenn will never ever return your feelings and enjoys the company of a guy named Sheridan? It's just so sad and unfortunate for Lennier.

I bet you Lennier grew up watching Hollywood movies. Er, I mean... Minbari movies. Perhaps action flicks. And of course, at the end of the film, the hero always gets the girl, right? Lennier probably absorbed all those films. He probably based his entire concept of love and romance around the dynamics of those relationships onscreen and how it always turned out well. Except real life, it just doesn't work that way. It isn't like a movie. In real life, a lot of love is unrequited, no matter how well you think you belong with someone else. No matter how well you get along with her as friends. In the movies, the other jock dude always lost in the end. Yet in this case, Sheridan being the jock... it doesn't follow the script. How bitter and unfair life is, Lennier must've thought.

He probably even thought, ya know what, I'll just send her an e-mail. Something short and sweet like "I <3 you." And instead of actually writing the word "love," he uses this emoticon that feels a little lighter and fluffier. So when she reacts poorly, he can just say that it's this uh, happy greeting that he gives to everyone on his email list. Ya know, just so he won't be completely humiliated when she rejects him? Or something like that.

And Lennier, he probably also had these moments where he'd be so frustrated and upset over pining for Delenn instead of being in an actual healthy romantic relationship with her that he'd mentally curse her as a bitch, or a whore or some other horrible thing. Of course, he's immediately regret it and take it back, because how could he actually say such awful things... he's in love with Delenn. It's a really frustrating and awful situation, but Delenn's not to blame. She's still awesome and intelligent and funny and great to be around. It's not her fault she doesn't feel that way for Lennier. It's nobody's fault but his, right? Cause he had to have these terrible feelings that're now ruining his life. So he starts mentally cursing himself. Of course, it's him and his warped sense of romance and all that.

Ultimately, he thinks... man, this is a really intolerable situation. And I'm gonna just hide my feelings inside and keep em in there until... I guess I'll somehow emotionally break down and reveal em? Maybe? It'd probably be pretty damn humiliating for me and solve nothing though. Cause she'll just say something that'll completely destroy me and drive me into further depths of depression. Perhaps I'll just jump off a bridge in the meantime. Or no, not a bridge. Cause there aren't any bridges over water bodies in outer space. How silly of me. I guess I'll think of something else. I'll think of something else.

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